On the lighter side..."A cheerful heart is the health of the body."* *Proverbs 17:22

1998 Spider Webb

Tales from Church Bulletins

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church.

The Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S.

The Pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning.

The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession.

Low self-esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 p.m. Please use the back door.

Ushers will eat latecomers.

For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."

Due to the Pastor’s illness, Wednesday’s healing services will be discontinued until further notice.

The music was all composed by George Friedrich Handel in celebration of the 300th anniversary of his birth.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church.

The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

The songfest was hell Wednesday.

Potluck supper: prayer and medication to follow.

Don’t let worry kill you off—let the church help.

The Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to the parish secretary.

New choir robes are needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

The choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

Weight Watchers will meet at 7 p.m. Please use the large double door at the side entrance.


Do you have a joke or a first person funny story that you would feel comfortable telling your grandmother? E-mail it to us at sfccr@slip.net September 1998, The San Francisco Charismatics (ISSN 1098-4046) Member of the Catholic Press Association of the United States and Canads. All rights reserved.

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